


counting seconds through the night

by nifeandaccurate (12AM)



Category: Inception (2010)
Genre: Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Panic Attacks, Social Anxiety, brief mention of vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-21
Updated: 2016-02-21
Packaged: 2018-05-22 09:24:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6073930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/12AM/pseuds/nifeandaccurate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s two in the morning and Arthur’s trying not to shake apart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	counting seconds through the night

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this late at night when I was feeling bad. I hope that someone else will find it comforting too.
> 
> Shoutout to velificantes for sharing Arthur with social anxiety headcanons, and originally posted [here.](https://nifeandaccurate.tumblr.com/post/138117527665/counting-seconds-through-the-night)

 

It’s the night before his first dreamshare job and he can’t decide if he wants to cry or vomit. His head is stuck in a loop of everything that could go wrong, every time someone will look to him for an answer he can’t give, every fumble of his hands. The ticking of the clock is loud in his ears; he knows sleep deprivation will look poorly on him tomorrow but he can’t stop himself from pacing the floor, wearing down the carpet in tight circles. He thinks of not showing up at the meeting point tomorrow, of staying home under the covers and shutting the windows tight. He hates how good that sounds.

It’s been three years and many false starts but he’s here. He refuses to go crawling back but his hands feel cold and clammy where they’re wrapped around his arms. It takes him too long to walk to the door of Mal’s room, pausing every few steps as a niggling voice tells him not to wake her up, not to bother her. He stops in the doorway, unable to take the last few steps to her side.

His head is buzzing and he feels like he’ll shake right out of his body. He doesn’t know how long he stands there, glassy eyed and still, when Mal makes a noise and turns over in bed. She rubs her eyes and catches sight of him.

“Oh, Arthur,” she says, her voice soft in the dark, “come here.” 

His legs unfreeze and he moves to sit on the edge of her bed. She reaches over and puts a hand on his arm. He shifts, letting her pull him to the center of the bed and wrap herself around him. She’s a warm presence against his back as she runs her hands up and down his arms. She does her best to ground him, whispering reassurances in his ears. He knows what she’s saying is true but he can’t quite bring himself to believe it.

He eventually falls asleep to the sound of Mal’s even breathing. Tomorrow, he’ll let Mal pick out a suit for him to wear to the meeting. Tomorrow, he’ll leave the house with his heart pounding in his throat. 

For now, he lets himself sleep.

 

 


End file.
